Jack´s blog

DAD TURNED up at my halls of residence on Saturday. I told him he was lucky to find me out of bed: one of the students on my floor has never been seen conscious. We´d hovered outside his door for days, wondering if he was dead. When we inched the door open, he certainly smelled enough, and no one wanted to touch him. Eventually, one of the civil engineers built this amazing retractable poking stick out of McDonald´s straws suspended from linked coat hangers, but it collapsed as soon as it reached the body, which was very embarrassing for Hui, who is Chinese and genuinely wants to learn how to make things that don´t collapse. He is now thinking of switching to music instead.